Hands Across The Sea; What Hyacinth Bucket Could Teach Mitt
Romney
A handsome, immaculately dressed man strides purposefully
into Buckingham Palace, is led by liveried servants to an inner sanctum where
the Monarch sits at her desk, escorts her (and her Corgis) through the hallowed halls to
a waiting helicopter, where the pair are whisked through London, and parachute into a rhapsodic Olympic crowd.
They alight, remove their gear, and the man turns to his
companion and says “I’m not sure pink really suits you.”
Mitt Romney had travelled many thousands of miles to hoist
the flag of American Exceptionalism at the very center of the people who had
sought to deny it (albeit 250 years ago) and he wasn’t going to give an inch of deference. Diplomacy be dammed.
So, he criticized his hosts for the way they were handling
the Olympics. The implication was clear-he
could have done it better. The Brits, needless to say, were not amused, and let
him know. “Mitt The Twit” was my favorite headline.
Really, this is a tempest in a Royal Doulton teapot with
hand-painted periwinkles. It
was a gaffe, and Romney walked it back a bit before going on to a GOP campaign
rally in Israel. But a small gaffe. one of delicacy rather than of substance.
Besides, if you ask the Brits, they revel in poking a bit at
the egos and pretensions of the better than thou. One of my favorite Brit-coms is “Keeping Up
Appearances” where the indomitable Hyacinth Bucket (pronounced “Bouquet, it’s
of French Origin”) holds court, desperately holding on amidst a sea of
crassness and hopeless relatives. She’s
bossy, pretentious, loud, overbearing, and every bit a delight. Part of the genius of the series is that
everyone is on to her-she's the only one not in on the joke. And part of the genius of the actress,
Patricia Routledge, is that she never breaks character
Once in a while, a politician will give you that unscripted
moment, a little glimpse behind the curtain, that tells you more about them
then they want you to know. Sometimes
it’s pretty prosaic: a campaign contribution from a questionable source, or an
old film clip of them saying something they would rather just have
forgotten. In a world of 24/7 news and
omniscient opposition research, there’s very little that can be hidden for too
long, and so the public has grown used to contradictions and even a little
indifferent to it. The 2012 Presidential
Election is a study in this. Few people
thought Mr. Obama would be the kind of President he has been, for good and
bad. And even the most full-throated
supporters of Mr. Romney, would, in a quieter moment, acknowledge the changeable
nature of his convictions.
But policy sometimes matters less than personality. We want to like the people we elect to lead
us. We will occasionally go against the
grain and pick a hothead for a state or local office to shake things up, but
realistically, in a democracy, we need to feel some connection. Reagan and Clinton could make it, Dukakis not
at all.
The jury is out on Romney, but the early returns are not
looking good. I’ve been fascinated by
Mitt’s refusal to release his tax returns, and the mystery around exactly what
happened at Bain, and when he left. It
fits a pattern of everything Mitt has done-he sanitized the public records of
his time at Governor of Massachusetts and there is virtually no public access
to the papers regarding his time as head of the 2002 Olympics.
Conventional thinking is that the information is politically
embarrassing: tax dodges, Swiss bank accounts, off-shore money, businesses
stripped of their assets while workers are let go. The rumors are probably
worse than the reality, and (conventional thinking again) Mitt should just get
it out there. Even the estimable Karl
Rove has suggested that Mitt be more forthcoming (he knows none of the above
would turn off GOP voters.) But Rove, I
think, for once is missing something.
Mitt’s a cold fish.
That is what the documents probably show. The guy who famously strapped his dog to the
roof of his car (and might have strapped the Queens’ Corgis to the roof of the
helicopter if given the chance) is all cold-blooded businessman, all the time. He is proud of what he has accomplished,
proud of the money he has earned, and unabashed by what it can buy. He’s also unabashed at the methods used to
obtain that success. If I had to guess,
absolutely everything Mitt did-every tax deduction, every corporate tactic, was perfectly legal. All in the clear. So why the caution?
There is nothing wrong with either money or pride, when they
are earned honestly. But, a President needs more, and the electorate, on a gut level, understands that. At Bain, Mitt's job was to
maximize returns through financial engineering and “creative destruction.” As
President, he's going to have to do better. Creative destruction may involve sacrifice by tens of millions of people and wrapping it up in
a “good management” bow-tie will be cold comfort for the losers. As Woodrow Wilson can attest, there’s a line between self-assurance and
arrogance. Fate has an odd way of
humbling even the highest.
Poor Hyacinth Bucket learned that as well. Once, her plans for an afternoon yacht cruise
and “nautical buffet with riparian entertainment” came crashing to Earth (and
river) leaving her with soaked clothes and a meal of fish and chips.
The Brits know how to laugh at themselves. Does Mitt?
MM
